Friends Forever.....

FRIENDS FOREVER by - MICHAEL W SMITH

Packing up the dreams, God planted...
In the futile soil, of you...
I can't believe the hopes He's granted
Means a chapter in your life is through
But I'll keep you close, as always
It wont ever seem you've gone...
Cause my heart, in big and small ways...
Will keep the love that kept, us strong...

And friends are friend forever,
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never,
Cause the welcome will not end..
Though it's hard to let you go,
In my Father's hands I know....
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends...

With the faith and love, God giventh
Springing from the hope, we know...
I'll pray for joy you live in...
And the strength that now, you show...
But I'll keep you close, as always
It wont ever seem you've gone..
Cause my heart, in big and small ways..
Will keep the love that kept, us strong...


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Tim got back his results for his econs ICA today...
I dunno why, I just felt disappointed as well... But he still looked very normal outwardly...
Why is it a thing in normal guys to conceal their emotions?
That is something I greatly admire in Jason, cause he isnt afraid to let out his emotions...
Aizat also releases his pent up emotions in certain unique ways.. or should I say bohemian...
well..

I was reading Timothy's blog yesterday... he posted after I posted my entry...
I could not help feeling very sad again...
I still do not understand why does he feel uncomfortable around me....
I dont look like an AJ conspiciously on the exterior... Nor do I talk like one most of the time...
Haiz...

There are times, we cry...
And reach out to the sky...
For the love we need, to hold our heads up high...
- A1 "One in Love"

Ezekial didi... It wasnt your fault that you conveyed the wrong message... You didnt really convey the wrong message... but you dont understand both me and Tim very well...
and... You cant really comprehend the friendship between me and him....
Dont blame yourself... I kinda forced it out of you more then you being willing to tell out...

Have I ever been plastic before?
(note: plastic is putting on a permernent false front in front of a particular person, for various reasons... It may be for a particular group also)
Yes, and that was when me and Ben were archenemies... but that was in the past...

But now... I feel that my actions towards Tim are getting so plastic... especially in front of my friends.... I dont want this to happen... but I just cannot help it...
Sometimes, I reveal my real emotion to him, and he knows that I am glum and still feeling sad about the entire event....

I've only been very plastic to a person once before... I dont want to do it again....
Especially to my... ex-best friend...
I just dont want Sonia, Jason and Sarah to feel worried for Tim or me...

They already have so much on their minds already... I would only be a burden to them...
I copied the IPRA hints for the examination today...
Timothy wasnt around... And I could have just pretended that Mr. Rajan didnt say anything important... Even Jason was contemplating whether to give a copied set of the IPRA hints to his friend who didnt turn up too....

But I did give it to Tim in the end...

Not that I didnt want to give it to him... but... I felt intruding into his space again...
what if he feels awkward?
what if he feels that I like him?
what if he becomes scared again?...
A million paranoid thoughts flooded my mind.. and I began to play the scaling game again...
Balancing the evils and goods of my actions...

I hope he's grateful that I gave him the notes...
Cos... no matter what... I dont want to see him suffer in his studies too...

Friends are friends forever...
Once a friend, always a friend.... through thick and thin, I will support my friends...
Be it rain or shine...

I will be there still for them...
This is my vow, to every of my close friends....

May God grant me strength to keep it....